Without A Sound
by brit10brat
Summary: A song fic based on the song 'Without a Sound' by SHeDAISY. Alex's POV about the night during Ghost!


**This is told from Alex's POV. She is remembering that night during Ghost.**

* * *

She was driving down the now unfamiliar highways she had the radio blaring as she tried to rid her mind of the memories of the past few days. Fate had such a way to be cruel to her. She was shot and lived, just to die. She was taken away from everything she had ever known and loved. As the tears rolled down her cheeks and the song came on the radio she had to pull over to keep from truly killing herself.

**I pull the covers 'cross the bed  
I tuck away the thoughts in my head  
And I live behind closed doors  
Knowing I will always love you more**

_Olivia had given her such pleasure that night reminding her of all the reason she, well not she but why Emily, hadn't found love yet. They were in bed together coming, Alex was coming down from the most recent high that Olivia had sent her on. She looked into those big brown eyes and opened her mouth to speak but, as she did Olivia captured her lips with her own. The kiss was passionate and filled with love. They finally broke apart when air became a necessity. Olivia reached down to pull the covers up to our necks blocking the chill from the room, "Let's not talk." She said._

**And I won't fall apart**  
**I won't lie in pieces on the ground**  
**I won't fall apart**  
**If we say it all without a sound**

_Again she captured my lips with her own and her hands began to roam as did mind until I found her firm breast. I began to knead it as her hands found my back and pulled me closer to her. Without breaking the kiss my hands travelled further down until they were cupping her sex. She moaned into my mouth and I broke away to begin kissing my way down her body. She slipped her fingers into my hair to massage my scalp. God I love that woman more than life itself._

**If we could last another day**  
**Filled with nothing left to say**  
**I will know I've loved my best**  
**Then maybe I could put my heart to rest**

_This time as I sent Olivia on the trip of lifetime I prayed that God would give me just one more day with her. Just one more day to be together, where I didn't have to be someone I wasn't and I didn't have to explain away someone else's past. I was begging so hard that I had begun to cry and when Olivia noticed this she kissed my tears away. I pulled her closed to me and held on to her for dear life. She just held me rubbing my back trying to sooth away my pain. Still not saying anything. I thought to myself I'll never forget this and my heart will always be hers._

**And I won't fall apart**  
**I won't lie in pieces on the ground**  
**I won't fall apart**  
**If we say it all without a sound**

_I knew that if we talked or if she told me about all that had been going on here that I would never be able to leave. So we just didn't talk. We touched everything. I savored every moment trying to engrave the feelings into my heart and my head. Finally she collapsed on to the bed and pulled me as close as she possible could making us one. I tried to sleep I really did but I just couldn't. I heard and felt her breathing even out and knew she was asleep. I turned over so that I could hold her and see her. She was so peaceful and even thought I tried to stop it from happening the tears came._

**If I could make the sun rise a little too slow**  
**To keep from hearing what I already know**

_I refused to shut my eyes that night. Hoping that if I didn't closed my eyes that the night would never end. I just stared at the love of my life as tears silently fell from my cheeks soaking the pillow under my head. I knew what the morning would bring and when I saw the first signs of a rising sun I began to sob uncontrollably, waking Olivia. When I opened my mouth to apologize nothing would come out and she understood. She pulled me close trying to still my shaking body. She also knew that I wouldn't be allowed to stay here. She knew that I was going to have to leave again. It was just a matter of time, we both knew it._

**And I won't fall apart**  
**I won't lie in pieces on the ground**  
**I won't fall apart**  
**If we say it all without a sound**

_Finally after what seemed like an eternity I was able to control my cries. Olivia threw back the covers and went to turn on the shower. I then was thrown back into a child like state. She came to me helped me up and got me into the shower. She washed my hair and my body all the while my tears still tumbling down my face. When she was finished she started to reapply soap to the wash cloth for herself but I was able to gain enough control to take it from her. She allowed me to do the same for her that she had done for me. When we left the apartment with Elliot we still hadn't spoken and maybe it was better that way._

**I will live behind closed doors**  
**Knowing I will always love you more**

Olivia I don't know how much longer I can do this. I miss you so much and there is no one here for me to go to. I just stay in this house leaving only for work. No one knows what's behind the closed doors of my heart. No one else will ever come close to the amazing woman you are. I will always love you more!

* * *

**If you like please review!**


End file.
